"We spend the first two years of their lives teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut up!"
"I went out with a biology teacher once, and a physics professor. Had to dump them both though. Just wasn't enough chemistry...!"
"Why did the teacher go cross eyed? He couldn't control his pupils!"
"There are 2 good reasons to become a teacher...July and August!""
"My old ma used to always want me to be a history teacher... problem is... there's no future in it!"
"When I was younger, my old man wanted me to have all the opportunities he never had...So he sent me to a girls school"
"I took the school bus home yesterday...police soon made me bring it back!"
"Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if they got paid a bit more they wouldn't need it!"